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Counselling has a long history of being described as a talking therapy — psychoanalysis was famously referred to as the “talking cure”. So it might feel as though there is an expectation to arrive at every counselling session with something to talk about.

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There isn't.

Some days, whether you're an adult or a young person, the words just aren't easily forthcoming. You might not know what you want to talk about. You might know something is there but not yet have the language for it. Or you might simply not feel like talking very much that day.

 

So what happens then?

 

The answer depends largely on you. If you want to be quiet for a while, you can. Silence doesn't necessarily mean that nothing is happening. Research into silence in therapy, such as that by Levitt & Morrill (2023), suggests that quiet moments can create space for reflection, feeling and processing — although, like most things in therapy, what silence means and whether it feels helpful is individual.

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You might prefer to do something instead. Words are only one way that we communicate. Sometimes drawing, making, playing a game, arranging objects, using imagery or simply having something sensory to hold or fiddle with can make it easier to explore what's happening.

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And sometimes doing something alongside another person makes talking easier too. There can be less pressure than sitting opposite someone and feeling as though you need to find the right words or make eye contact.

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That's one reason I've think carefully about the environment at Number 11. Whether you are an adult, child or young person, you are welcome to use, move, play with or make things from the things in the room.

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Of course, you don't have to use any of them. They're simply there because counselling doesn't always have to look like two people sitting in chairs and talking for fifty minutes.

Sometimes there are words. Sometimes there aren't.

We can work with both.